Monday, 23 July 2007

Women, but not TV editorial, for rent

Another anonymous submission:

"i was watching an American TV show and there was a young, impressionable girl in it who thought she had been discovered and was about become a modelling star. Her justification for the belief was that she had been booked do a 'photo shoot' in Dubai. Little did she know, her agent / manager / pimp had actually arranged for her to be a hooker for a couple of days.

"The plot was foiled by our undercover hero, who was told: 'The girls only model in America, but if you're going to the Middle East, I'll get them to do whatever you want'.

"Quite apart from this glowing travelogue, my favourite line was provided by the wide-eyed innocent girl, who said: 'I'm doing a shoot in Dubai. That's near Saudi Arabia'."

Whoops. The long arm of censorship doesn't stretch as far as cable channels in the US, then.

I'm pretty sure DTCM didn't sanction that particular mention of our fair city, and I'm not sure it's going to appear in the press clippings report at the month. But then again, if the TV crew had been hosted by a world-class airline and stayed in an iconic landmark hotel, perhaps things might have turned out differently ...

You can imagine the reworked script now. Obviously, no hooker activities involved, and the wide-eyed innocent would have said: "I'm doing a fashion shoot in Dubai. That's the tourism and business hub of the Middle East, formerly a sleepy pearl-fishing village, but now a glistening metropolis, with something for everyone, including a cheery little mascot called Modhesh!"

27 comments:

Anonymous said...

There's an even worse fate than that if you're not careful - you may have to marry Neil Petch

Anonymous said...

Come on, we all know there are no prostitutes in Dubai, just as there are no Jews, no gay people, no poor people, no disabled people, no drugs, no gambling, no cars with their windows tinted more than 30%...

docrc said...

If you guys don't come up with anything new and riveting soon, I shall shortly be deleting this from my favorites list.

Anonymous said...

Very clever. How about listing your sources so we _can_ include it in the month's clips report, eh? Or did you hear this from a friend who's heard it from a friend who knows a friend?

Idiots.

Anonymous said...

Why is XPRESS not on your poll?

mediamonster said...

I thought about putting Xpress on, but it's not a daily, and is more like a supplement (albeit a frequently juicy one) of GN.

Anonymous said...

Seems like the bloated, verbally incontinent editor of RetailME has been given the chop. Anyone got the goss?

anon_mediator said...

anon @ 17.21

It was from an American series called Burn Notice, lifted from the internet but shown in US about 10 days ago.

mr sneezy said...

docrc - it's summer and dubai media scene is quiet ... why don't you go out and cause some havoc or sniff for gossip? if you work for ET, you could even go and look for an _actual_ story ... or, you could go and join the campaign staffers (renamed All Bar One) at motivate ...

Anonymous said...

anon_mediator,

What channel?

Anonymous said...

RetailME? Sounds fascinating. He'll find another job in Dubai though. It doesn't matter how crap he is. Someone will hire him.

Anonymous said...

Anon @ 17.54

Because it took two years to cobble together, because they have a week to compile it and a full team of hacks but still have to get half the copy from outside and because I still can't find it anywhere! It's therefore disqualified from any such polls.

anon_mediator said...

anon @ 00.15: it's on USA Network (I think, though internet file didn't specify) - http://imdb.com/title/tt0810788/

Anonymous said...

mediamonster said...
I thought about putting Xpress on, but it's not a daily, and is more like a supplement (albeit a frequently juicy one) of GN.

24 July, 2007 18:40

XPRESS is a weekly newspaper.
It is NOT a supplement of Gulf News. It is produced in the same building yes, but has a completely separate editorial and production team. Staff of the two publications are forbidden by company policy even to exchange contacts to preserve the paper's independence. To say it is a supplement of Gulf News is like calling the Sun a supplement of the Times - plainly ridiculous. I cannot vote in your poll because it bizarrely includes papers that don't exist any more while omitting ones that do. Are you now practising the kind of censorship that your blog proclaims to hate? Include all the papers or your poll is meaningless.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...
Anon @ 17.54

Because it took two years to cobble together, because they have a week to compile it and a full team of hacks but still have to get half the copy from outside and because I still can't find it anywhere! It's therefore disqualified from any such polls.

25 July, 2007 09:48

I can't find Emirates Evening Post - and neither can anyone - but it is still on the poll.

disciple of the sawyer said...

Anon @ 13.19.

Can you get your post to make a little noise to go with the text? I reckon it's missing the sound of a little girl's red patent leather shoe stamping repeatedly on the ground.

What an utter loser! Hilarious.

bhoyrul is a twat said...

Anonymous @ 13.19...

'I cannot vote in your poll!' is it just me, or does anyone else think that this poster is about to burst into tears?

You write as if anyone here gives a flying f*ck what you think about this poll or the risible Xmess.

I can assure you, however, that 'I cannot vote in your poll!' is highly unlikely to enter the pantheon of great expressions wherein you might find 'I have a dream..' or 'Ich bin ein Berliner'. Sorry.

Anonymous said...

anon @ 13.19 - collect your teddies and put them back in the pram.

The titles mentioned in the poll are all published daily, or at least 5 times a week (poor 7Days).

But I must admit, I found your outburst of passioned defence for the title and the poll's positive injustice to be bizarrely heartwarming.

And PS, you don't have to vote.

Oh and PPS, supplements to papers often have separate staff. Doesn't make them independent from each other (see weekly supplements, sports supplements, magazines, etc)

Anonymous said...

Ha ha ha ha!

Anon @ 13.19 & 13.21 - I'm guessing you work on Xmess? Just cos you got conned into it don't take it out on the rest of us...

Anonymous said...

IT'S NOT A FUCKING SUPPLEMENT. PICK UP GULF NEWS ON A THURSDAY AND SEE IF XPRESS COMES WITH IT. NO? THERE"S YOUR ANSWER YOU FUCKWITS

Anonymous said...

If you buy Gulf News on a Thursday you get a free copy of Xmess.

It's a supplement. Even better, it's a free supplement!

JUST AS WELL REALLY! EH, MATE? YEAH, YOU! WITH THE STICKY CAPS LOCK BUTTON AND THE MINGING GIRLFRIEND!

Anonymous said...

Regardless of the debate regarding X-Mess, the fact remains that it is a completely rubbish attempt at a tabloid with nothing of any note ever published in it, save a few Filippino workers giving their opinions on some crappy question, and the bizarre figures on how much time the staff have wasted talking about a particular 'issue'. Oh and something on where some nutter has bought her clothes that week. Newsworthy stuff indeed.

As for the 'supplement' question - if it's so bloody original, how come I've read all the stories before they come out???

Anonymous said...

Everyone knows Xpress is a Gulf News supplement which you get as a freeby with the main paper - what's there to discuss...

Anonymous said...

OK, this is getting silly and going round in circles, rather like an argument I had with a particularly noxious little PR the other day. Anyone got any goss?

Anonymous said...

"Quite apart from this glowing travelogue, my favourite line was provided by the wide-eyed innocent girl, who said: 'I'm doing a shoot in Dubai. That's near Saudi Arabia'."

Well I hate to be the pedantic one but, well Dubai IS near Saudi Arabia, we share a common border (albeit the UAE border).

Don't really understand that thread anyway.

More interestingly, who knows the identity of the mysterious bottom-pinching advertising type who stalks the Media Bar.

Anonymous said...

XPRESS is great on so many levels.

Enough said.

Debbie does Dubai said...

There is no newspaper worth my 2 secs of read in the UAE. Except sometimes if i am in the mood for being cynical or entertained.